But more akin to this:
Normally, like 96% of the time I am just playful, fun ol' Rowdy. Until I feel pushed or threatened for no good reason. Then I go into what I've always described to myself as 'cobra mode'. I feel like I've reared up taller, my traps are flared out and I'm in an attack pose. Ready to strike.
Or if you're like me and took years of anatomy and physiology in school then you know it better as the sympathetic nervous system at work. Fight or flight. It's opposite is the parasympathetic nervous system aka feed and breed.
Very few of my friends have seen this side of me, the 'cobra mode'. Fight or flight kicking in on me often turns to fight when it comes to dealing with people. And often flight when it is just situational nervousness. Aron D saw it a few times when people tried to pick on me at a bar or a party or whatever when I was in college. "Bros" and the typical d-bag think a 5' 7", 140lb guy is an easy mark to try and alpha dog.
They learn that is not the case. Thankfully I've grown and calmed down, but with all that in the past I am still not afraid to fight and get physical when I feel it is time.
Yesterday some of my newer San Diego friends saw me start to slip into feeling it was time. They said things like, "wow, I've never seen you like that before", or "I didn't know you had that in you", or "whoa, look at Evil Rowdy" and stuff like that.
It's probably best not to tell the story in too much detail here, but someone in authority at my shooting competition on Saturday tried picking on me. 'Cause I'm not as famous as some of the other people involved, I was from out of town and people take me to be an easy mark.
The exchange was heated and I was in attack posture. Cobra mode. Verbal, quick, assertive and not backing down**. In a room full of 60 people with guns no less. (but as we're all responsible that wasn't even ever thought of as an issue. to me it is just funny in retrospect)
Rough. Ready. Rowdy.
**I prevailed in the exchange. To my benefit and that of 5 other shooters.
I can relate to the animal & primitive instincts. It wasn't until recently that the neighbor's landscaper decided it was necessary to turn his industrial sized weed-whacker on my dog. I felt like an angry mother bear. It's a good thing I got to him before he could hurt her. I felt as though I could've ripped his face off with my bare teeth. Until then, I've never had such a strong reaction.
ReplyDeleteI always mad cry when I get really heated, kinda takes the tough out of it.
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