You can't know sweet without tasting bitter.

Went to the hospital yesterday for a regular treatment and ended up staying a little extra due to how I am feeling. I had emailed my GI doctor earlier in the day and he was aware of how I felt and suggested doing the same things we have done already this year in a bid to what now sounds like delay surgery, rather than out and out prevent it.

After a quick history of how I've been feeling and a physical exam I was given an IV does of corticosteroids and a 1 liter bolus of fluids. I had been tapering off the prednisone at home, down to 5mg per day but that has now been bumped up to 40mg per day.

We both agree that long term usage of prednisone is not the way to go. Especially as I already have a big of bone mass loss because of it. And some of the other side effects as well. And since I am already taking Remicade and Pentasa there really isn't much more I can do pharmacologically.

Now I am home, told to rest, only have clear liquids, continue all my regular medications but increase my does of prednisone to 40mg. And wait. And watch. And see what happens. This is where I now am at.

When I was texting in sick to work at the bike shop from the hospital my boss said something back about how sucky this all is. In that moment I fully agreed, my life does totally suck. Then I realized though how many times he and others have told me how awesome of a life they think I lead. So which is it?

It is both. I happen to think on the line of horrible to amazing, if graphed would look like an inverse bell curve for my life. Whereas I think the general population has more events in the middle and less at either end.

I realize though this is needed. You can't have good without bad, light without dark, sweet without bitter. Life should be balanced and there has to be opposition in all things. Not opposition defined as someone or something actively opposing you trying to defeat your goals but opposition in the yin and yang sense.

This has to be. It is what it is. Do I wish I never had to deal with my Crohns disease again? Totally!! For my life, dealing with it happens to be a requirement. While it may bring some temporary darkness to my mood and thoughts, it also helps sharpen my appreciation of the good things. The great things. Things in this case being the people in my life and the experiences I have living.

So reader, don't fret or worry about me. Appreciate the great things in you life. Use what is bitter to focus on the better. That is what I am doing. And it is good, so try it!