My Country...

My country tis of thee,
Sweet land of liberty,
Of thee I sing.
Land where my fathers died!
Land of the Pilgrim's pride!
From every mountain side,
Let freedom ring!

My native country, thee,
Land of the noble free,
Thy name I love.
I love thy rocks and rills,
Thy woods and templed hills;
My heart with rapture fills
Like that above.

Let music swell the breeze,
And ring from all the trees
Sweet freedom's song.
Let mortal tongues awake;
Let all that breathe partake;
Let rocks their silence break,
The sound prolong.

Our father's God to, Thee,
Author of liberty,
To Thee we sing.
Long may our land be bright
With freedom's holy light;
Protect us by Thy might,
Great God, our King!

I've been a lot of places in the world but I truly believe that the United States of America is a special place and if we adhere to the true tenets of  the nation's founding we can be the greatest nation in the world.

Reading or better yet singing the lyrics to, My Country Tis of Thee, I just had to  share them with you. The next four posts I think will be songs, poetry and quotes of a patriotic and historical nature. Tune in to have your faith restored.

Turbid

Man, the water was super cloudy while trying to snorkel yesterday..... This is about all I could get. Should have surfed instead. Oh well......

Rowdy-isms -or- stuff I probably say too often.

Anything that has to be filmed from a helicopter has to be pretty bad a$$.

Crosswords are for people who need word searches with hints.

I'm like Donald Duck, I hate to wear pants.

If you go fast enough, speed bumps become speed jumps.

No flashing lights? No flat tires? No problem with that move then.

If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

Wanna know the easiest way to do something? Ask the laziest person how to do it.

Aint nothing to it, but to do it.

I don't just want candy, I need candy! (Carl voice from ATHF)

Challenged at the Challenge

This past Friday through Sunday I spent up north of LA shooting in the West Coast Steel Championships. There are 8 standard stages that you shoot 5 times with your worst time thrown out. Each stage has 5 targets set up in different ways. It is a very simple, elemental test of shooting skill. At speed.

Three stages I shot averagely. Two stages I shot great. Three stages I shot poorly. I was category hunting at this match, shooting a gun I rarely shoot and in a type of match I'd never shot before. Not excuses, but just clarifying. It was my plan to shoot a category with few entrants in the hope of placing better overall in my division. Scores will be posted in a week, seemingly by passenger pigeon, so I'll let you know how I've done then.

So I didn't win my division. That I do know. But I learned I need to control some of my match jitters better when doing something new. I need to stick with what I am good at, not change the game plan. (meaning I shouldn't have shot a gun I rarely shoot)

Shooting in the competitions I do are a new and unique challenge for me. My mentor says I have all the skills within me to be very good at it, but they just need to be developed. I'm not inherently lacking anything to be successful at shooting competitively. But it is odd in what it takes to win. You have to execute basic skills, perfectly, on demand with no warm up. We all shoot the same course of fire. But I have to real opponent. I don't have to worry about what team mates or what someone else is doing. To win I just need to be the fastest with the least mistakes. It is all on me.

Right now in major matches my ability to perform consistently at my best is not there. My standard deviations are too great from "awesome". With time and good practice, this will change for the better. No reason for it not to and I'm up for the challenge.

Progression Session

One of the things I've learned I like to do is downhill mountain bike. This is the "extreme" form of mountain biking. This isn't about being skinny and going a long distance off road. It's about jumps, stunts, gnarly terrain, speed and so on.

I am not 18. I'm not 20 or 25 or even gasp 30. I've ridden various two wheeled things my whole life but I never raced bmx as a kid or had a motocross bike when younger. So big jumps are kinda new to me and mentally intimidating. When there is a 10 foot gap you got to clear on a pedal or gravity powered bicycle let's just say that still gets in my head.

I've done steeps, loose stuff, big table tops, wooden stunts but for some reason doing doubles or gap jumps just got in my head and I rode around them. Until today.

There is a saying I believe, it comes in various forms but it basically goes like this, "Things don't get easier to do, you just get better at doing them." It's not that the nature of whatever challenge has changed, but that I have. In this case I changed by just shutting off the part of my brain, quietly but very persistently, telling me that a mistake wasn't worth the reward.

I just shut if off. I turned off my brain, focused on the task at hand and went for it.

And I made it. And I did it again. The trepidation and the fear started to fade. Then I went to a bigger jump. And made it. Success breeding confidence like a Mountain Dew fueled nuclear reactor of bicycling.

You know me, then I'm like, "let's break out the camera!" Thankfully one of my riding buddies was nice enough to put what he was doing on hold and attempt to capture my breakthrough. Thanks man!

Confidence

As a basic theory it is my opinion the confidence comes from mental and physical preparation. Do what you physically can and do what you mentally can and you should thus feel confident.

By nature and nurture I am a competitive person. Thus, I do not enjoy losing. OK, I can understand losing but I most vehemently don't like it when I beat myself. I can understand, but not tolerate, that someone was better than me at something on any given day. They probably did more work than me, thus they won. But when I beat myself? Intolerable.

Confidence goes a long way towards winning. However you want to define either of them, confidence or winning. With that theme in mind I'd like to share some of what I've learned to have confidence, a winning mindset.

-Have a plan for your practice and document your progress. Things need to be directed and measured to track improvement. If you don't write it down, it didn't happen.

-Rest. Very few people over train. In reality what you are is under rested. Keep your level of training but increase your level of resting to match. Nap to win-Andre Galvao.

-Daily "do". Have something you need to daily in your training or preparation or whatever. Every dang day. There are no off days. Even it is just 1 minute of mental visualization, you better be doing something every day towards your goal. Which is winning. Successful people do daily what others do occasionally.

-Practice doesn't make perfect, it makes permanent. Focus on the quality of what you are doing, not the quantity. Some sports or actions or whatever require long hours and a high number of reps to gain expertise. But don't confuse doing something "a lot" with doing it well.

-Be withing yourself. Reduce the amount of outside stimulus that distracts you. You have an opponent, an objective, a time, and action. There is something that requires you to be doing it. If you are distracted you aren't "here". You need to be present within yourself. Reduce distractions. Focus. There is nothing else but the now.

-If you have to think about something that you're doing, you are not doing it perfectly yet. When your desired skillset or action becomes autonomic (and you practiced the right thing) then you are doing in perfectly. Thinking is the enemy of perfection-Bruce Lee

I have a big shooting competition for the next three days up in Los Angeles. Once again a 'sponsor' is paying my travel costs. I'm wearing their t-shirt. Money can be won. It is a championship thing for the western US. But am I nervous? Not at all. Why? Because I know what I have done mentally and physically. I am prepared in both areas. And in that I am confident.

Reads and Rants

Two books have came onto my radar that I'd like to read. Maybe I should just order them when I get my Hebrew textbook $36...

The first is "The Watchers" by Shane Harris, subtitled 'The Rise of the American Surveillance State'. I like his writing in a magazine I subscribe to and I think the timing is good based on the recent stuff about the NSA. $28 from B&N.

Secondly is "The Skies Belong to Us" by Brendan Koerner, subtitles 'Love and Terror in the Golden Age of Hijacking' that was released today. It is staggering to realize just how many planes were hijacked in the 60s and 70s and by extremely diverse individuals. Again, something that works as interesting reading in today's climate and a little covered topic. $20.

Finally "The Son" by Phillip Meyer. A sweeping book covering 4 generations of Texans from 1840's onward. If you loved Michener then you'll dig this as well. $15

So roughly $80 dollars for four books I'll enjoy owning. The ebooks are hardly any cheaper and I'd have spent the same if I'd gone to four movies. With probably less to show for it in the long run. (I love you cinema but I loved books first)

Enough reading, now for ranting. And this will be full of fragment sentences and jumps in subject matter, like a typical rant, so just bear with me.

Would you walk around town with your email and cell number printed on your tshirt? Would you rent a billboard buy a busy freeway and put pictures of your kids on it with their names? That's what you are doing when you use social media and especially facebook (fb).

Information about yourself is worth something. That is why you keep it private. When you use fb you are just giving it away. And to who, you don't know and have no control over. Stop using fb if you care at all about your personal privacy. And twitter. I committed fb suicide well over a year ago and my twitter account is going to die this week as well.

But, but, but you say.... Your life will be soo empty without fb. Let's look at it this way? Are you the type of person who would eat fast food 2 or 3 times a day? If you're that disgusting then you should love fb because that is the type of social interaction "food" you are consuming when you use fb. You do it 'cause it's cheap and easy.

If you want a McDonalds diet for the majority of your social life, then by all means continue to use tons of social media and fb in particular. Cheapen your relationships and make them all about ease and convenience. When you use fb you are taking the easy way out (when is this ever the best way??) and giving away for free everything of your own private and personal value.

I may strongly dislike NYC but I hate FB even more and I think you should too.

Stop biting me!

Today I was working out at Balboa Park and I got stung by a bee in the grass while doing push ups. Having been bitten by a fish recently in such a Jaws like way I thought I'd catalog all the different creatures who've "bitten" me in some way.

-bee
-parrot fish
-garter and water snake
-ferret
-dog
-cat
-rat
-parrot, lark, goose, duck
-stingray
-mosquito, sand fleas, tick, spider
-crab

If another new type of animal bites me in the next week I don't know what I am going to do. I've already been "bitten" by like 9 different types of creatures, which I bet is far above the average. I doubt going vegan would save me from this peril as you notice I've never been bitten by a cow, chicken, turkey, shrimp or salmon.

Great, now listing all these animals I'm hungry!!

A tale of men.

LK-LK is my biological father. His genetics make me half Norwegian. Short with red hair. And possibly the reason why I have Crohns disease as he has Ulcerative Colitis. I don't know the whole, true story of how it all broke down but I know he got my mom pregnant in high school and then wasn't around after the fact. I reached out to him a few years ago and we've met in person and still talk occasionally. I'd say we are friends.

But what has been most interesting to me is to see how he and his family have had to deal with the revelation of my existence. How something from soooo long ago and still effect you now. Everything happens for a reason. We all make mistakes. You've heard all those things before.

All I know now is he seems to have tried the rest of his life to be a good dad to the kids he did raise and genuinely seems contrite over what I'm sure was truly a tough situation when he was a teenager. I of course hold no judgment against him and hope he forgives himself as well.

TCB-TCB is my dad. The person who raised me. Neither he or my mom graduated from college. They had to make it in life with hard physical work. As there were 4 of us kids and I became a financial and medical nightmare at age 10 or 11 with my mom a stay at home mother, things were tough for dad. This may sound unfair, but most of my memories of dad are him working. Always working and never at home.

But he had to. When you gotta build a fence at the dentists house to pay the bill, you know you are working to survive. So I guess without trying that is the number one thing I learned from TCB is hard work. How to relentlessly move forward. Push push push go go go. I do no honestly think my dad has ever quit anything in his life.

He may not have taught me anything about sports but my dad taught me how to be a responsible gun owner, how to keep my tools properly,how to do home repairs and work on my cars, to balance my finances; taking care of needs first and then my wants, the importance of doing your duty. Some good life skills.

Both LK and TCB have taught me that you can change. And that through his life a man should change for the better. You can be a long haired, rock guitar playing, draft dodging, red neck hippie and evolve into a dedicated, white collar professional, Christian (in the good way), family man. If that's not a 180 I don't know what is.....?

TJB-This is my brother. In many ways I think he is a photocopy of TCB. Especially the good parts. My brother has taught me that your gpa doesn't always reflect how smart you really are. And that there can be a mix of fun and seriousness that doesn't have to contradictory or difficult to balance in your life. I guess he is proof to me that you can do it, be it and have it all.

BIL's-My brothers in law. The dude's who married my sisters. Good luck with that guys! hahaha. Serious, I'm thankful for the love you show my sisters. And even though one of you gave me a concussion I still wish we could hang out more.

JW-Dude, I would have never thought you'd be the perfect piece to complete Jeweled Malicious Barbie's puzzle. But you seem to be and I'm proud to have you in the family. I look forward to years of knowing you more.

GC-Wow, talk about stepping into an instant family. Any guy that marries a woman who already has been married and divorced with 3 kids is showing the type of love and toughness few men have today. I give you my true respect and really am thankful for what you've done, though I know it was tough.

RMB-Myself. Me. I'm unsure of how much to reveal about myself here in this particular area as frankly I'm not to proud of much of my history as an adult male. If you drew up columns of good and bad I'd have more in the 'bad' column and the actions in my past bring only feelings of remorse. I'm soo sorry to the people I hurt from age 17-33. I'm just glad I can look around and see good example in my life to help me learn sooo many different things about being a good man. I'm working on it and you never know just how much you've effected me.

Notable others: My uncles were surrogate dads for a week each summer and always seemed to enjoy spending time with me. Mr. Bendixon and Mr Daggett. I'd probably be dead or in jail if it weren't for you two in my teens. Rebellion and risk taking was strong in my and you helped moderate it.

Tenderness

First, I will be writing a biographical post for Father's Day soon, so if you want some Rowdy history be sure to tune back in for it.

But this post is about tenderness. For the past week I have had multiple, daily influences that have softened my heart. Made me feel an empathetic tenderness. Which is something new for me. And no, I am not "on meds" or anything else. Goodness, can't a guy have feelings?

But first a list of recent events in the world that just saddened me. (source: ForeignPolicy.com)
-Egypt's Muslim Brotherhood has begun deploying street-level workers to address everyday problems like bread distribution. People are still waiting in line for bread in this world. In a country that used to hold in physical from a majority of then known knowledge in the library at Alexandria.

-Mexican authorities rescued 51 migrants, mostly from Guatemala, who were allegedly kidnapped and held in Nogales, near the border with Arizona. 51! The effort, planning and environment that creates a place where this many disadvantaged people can be kidnapped is mind numbing.

-Russian President Vladimir Putin said Thursday that the country's ability to continuously raise state spending has been "exhausted." Can you understand the implications of this? Globally and for the individual Russian citizen?

So when in see a famous motorcycle race show genuine compassion for people with Down Syndrome, really see it in his face. It's not a show, it touches me. I suppose someone who is at the pinnacle of their sport to be insular, above the common fray, traveling the world and making millions. Solely focused on what they do... And yet not. You've greatly risen in my estimation Jorge Lorenzo.

I hear a wife talk about her husband and their relationship in honest praise and love in how he chose to turn his life around and the impacts that has had on their personal relationship and family life. Honesty change and the humility to implement it. Sincerity.

The wife of one of my friends gave birth almost 8 weeks early. He called me to help give emotional and spiritual support the day she entered the hospital. Today he has his son at home. Growing and acting like a normal child, free from all that could befall a baby that premature. To see how he has reacted to this trial in his life, hear it in his voice as he talks about it son. Tears in my eyes.

I watch Super D be on call. Already having worked a regular 40 hour week she spends 12 hours then on a Saturday, doing emergent things to change people's lives. Tired, sore, sick and yet continuing to move forward doing something few people can do. And vastly impacting the lives of her patients. As someone who is "funemployed" to see this level of professional dedication up close, when I don't do the same, well I can see why she was doctor of the year for her specialty.

Saturday I volunteered 8 hours of my time to teach something I am good at to the general public. I interacted with hundreds of people from 7 to 70 and all walks of life. I was on my feet, in the sun, teaching non-stop. To work with people and directly impact their thoughts, actions and abilities helping them grow and learn with no judgement on my part felt great. I never tired. I never failed. And my efforts were met with genuine thanks and appreciation.

I hate the question "Why is this happening?" I could care less why something happens in my life, I care about HOW I wan do something about it or WHAT I can change. For the most part why is of the lowest order for me. I don't care why in the past week I've had my heart softened and that things have been more touching for me. I just know that they have.

Empathy, a tender heart. They are all developing more within me. Thankfully.

I've beat real doctors at the game Operation.

And now I'm getting another chance to show what I can do...........................

I was selected to compete in the IDPA National Championships this September in Oklahoma! I made the cut, now I got to put in some more work!

My goal is top 10 in my classification, Expert.

Rowdystyle.

You just never know....

I had my first Hebrew class last night and you never would have picked my teacher out of a crowd and said, "Oh yeah, he is definitely a Hebrew teacher.
-60 years old
-from Detroit
-Christian
-Black
-never been to Israel

But I enjoy the class, the language and so on. And if I get to go to graduate school in Israel this will pay off so greatly. I dream of a lot of things, but when I think of actually accomplishing something of worth that year of graduate school, abroad and in an area of study I enjoy it keeps me moving forward.

Back in the 80s the Army ran a recruitment commercial with the tagline "we do more before 6am than most people do all day". Hardly an enticement if you ask me. But I do get in more shooting practice and bike jumps in before noon than most people do all day.

Tres Hats and My Photographic Eye

Off topic, I shaved my beard off today. So back to smooth face, but still buzzed on top. Deal with it mom. =)

I must have awesome hat style sense, because on three different vacations in 3 different countries seemingly normal locals have asked for my hat. To buy, barter or beg.

In Malaysia I traded a security guard at the MotoGP race a Fox Racing hat for his race security hat. Which I don't think I have anymore, to my chagrin.

In Chile I gave away a black fleece Neff hat with ears like a bear. One of the guides I went trekking and rock climbing with really wanted it and always commented on how awesome he thought it was. I actually gave him the hat and some other REI gear I had as well. He needed it.

I also seem to have this idea, possibly from literature about nomadic tribes that if someone compliments you on a possession you should give it to them. Like giving shelter to someone in a storm no matter what. That kind of thing.

So in Mexico last week when the guy who was leading a snorkel tour I was one offered to buy my Vans hat I told him I'd think about it. He brought it up a few more times. Finally I decided to give it to him as a tip.

Are Vans, Fox and Neff missing something in their market analysis? Are the tariffs for importing basically what you'd find at Tillys soo great to these countries they can't make a profit?

Either way, 3 trips, 3 countries, 3 years and 3 hats gone.

Finally, I went on a motorcycle ride today for 3 hours to do some thinking. Along the way I saw three things that would of made great pictures if I'd had all my photo stuff with me. A cell phone was not going to cut it!
-A guy on a Del Mar bluff in full oil painting equipment, isolated against the sky painting the cliffs and oceans.
-Old farm equipment rusting in a field. Black and white, uh hello!
-Through the up arrow in a sign on the walkway over the Coaster tracks in Solana beach I saw a hot airballon. The two superimposed within each other.

Anyone can learn how to work a camera. Not anyone can have the eye to "see" what makes a good picture. I have that eye and hope to develop it!

Fish Rabies, Time Travel and First Class

While in Mexico snorkeling last week I got bit by I think a parrot fish. Whatever the species it hurt and I now probably have fish rabies. Here is a picture of the bloody wound. Video of the snorkeling trip will be coming soon.

I've been reading a lot of science books lately and really have had my concept of "time" altered. I now fully believe that time is just a measured change of state. Time is fluid, variable and changing. It is not something to do with clocks or seconds. Time is really just a change in state.

When I fly anywhere outside of the US I fly first class. If you are not sure it is worth the extra money, I say it totally is. To be honest I normally sit there somewhat smugly or with an air of aloofness. This last trip I decided to change up my attitude about it after receiving an internal impression I should. I now have to go to page 21 of my passport to find an empty page, and that is the only empty page.

I told myself I would look each person in the eye that walked by me and say something nice about them in my mind for the next 10 people who walked past me. I found it really enjoyable and didn't stop till over twenty passengers walked by the sparkly eyed red head goofily staring at them for no apparent reason.

First class tickets buy you a seat, but they don't by class.

True vacation stories. Bro.

-I took lots of pictures of what I thought were silly warning signs. Seems people actually do die from falling into a geyser or getting gored by a bison. I got within 3 yards of a bison, nothing happened. I walked off trail and up to a geyser. Nothing happened. I jumped over a retaining wall to a cliff edge to take pictures. Nothing happened. I still did my thing, but man, the thought of being boiled alive in a sulpherous geyser gives me the willies.

-My parents were hippies. Now they are pretty conservative. But still, who else but the child of hippies would hear, "what did you do to your hair?!?! Don't come back again until you have longer hair!!" and I don't think she was but 1/4 joking. Nothing about looking more healthy or fit. Nothing about having grown a beard. Just that I had short hair.

-Utards. So there I was bemoaning the idiocy of the average Utah driver when one of Hurricane City's finest pulls me over for 62mph in a 45mph. When asked if I knew why he pulled me over I said yes and when he asked if I knew I was going that fast I said yes, all very friendly and plainly. When I'm caught I'm caught. Besides, I haven't had a speeding ticket in 8 years so I was due one. (the last one I was going 126mph in a 65 and was cited for 88mph) This time my fine was $99 as he wrote it for 55 in a 45, so pretty cheap if you ask me.

-Mexican food. Having lived in either Arizona or California for the past 13 years I love Mexican food. Good, real Mexican food. If you go into a place and all the workers are white, leave.(i'm talking to YOU st george!) Trust me, I knew this and still didn't. Ugh. Thankfully I found Don Miguel in Cedar City!! Perfecto y sabrosa! Btw Utards, Cafe Rio is not "good" Mexican food.

-Highs and lows. The lowest temperature in the past week was in Jackson Wyoming reading 28F in a 35mph wind, for a felt temp of -6F!!! A gas stop in Baker on the way home showed a high of 104F. This vacation is turning into a western hemisphere version of last summer's vacation in lots of ways.

-Vacation repeats itself. Last summer was a week in Israel and a week long road trip around Norway. This summer is a week driving around different national parks and then 4 days on the beach in Cozumel Mexico. See the commonalities? Much less flying this time! Next summer's vacation is already set in going with Killer back to S Korea and having him show us around.

-2,600 miles. That's how many miles got put on the truck this roadtrip. Wow. It needs its oil changed after just one week of driving! Also it needs a serious, serious interior detailing. Any referrals in the San Diego area?

-I learned a lot about my camera and photography, mostly that one is good and the other needs quite a bit of work!

US Vacation pt2

So part 1 was Bryce, Zion and Cedar Break parks. Part two was Jackson, Grand Teton and Yellowstone. Then it is off to Cozumel Mexico for the "vacation from vacation".

Part one was sunny and mostly warm in southern Utah. Part two was rainy and cold in Wyoming. It was at one time 28F and snowy and at most 53F and overcast. Ate trout, venison and elk. As for live animals I saw elk, bison, osprey and so on. Sadly I didn't ever see a bear or wolves.

Hopefully part three will be warm and calm on a Mexican beach. With lots of fun fish to see snorkeling.

And of course here are some pictures. I've been using my new camera, lenses and such from my birthday gift. I'm a little disappointed in my photos but I am entirely self taught and using my camera all on manual definitely makes things trickier. Shooting with a bright sky, shadows and with water just makes balancing my exposures soooo tough.

Nonetheless, here ya go readers!